my friend white man.

in sunday school the classic answer was always "jesus". answer "jesus" to any question and your bound to get it right. or at the very least, you'd be granted approval from the sundayschool teacher.

answer, "white, middle-class, heterosexual, men" with disdain, to any question in women's studies, and the whole room will nod. yes. that is the correct answer. and if your feeling extra saucy, throw "evangelical" beside "heterosexual man", and the equation gets even uglier. and you become even smarter. we all know it. this is our enemy. it's come up in every single class. who has the power? who writes/decides history? whose experiences count as legitimate in society? who gets to be the subject? who gets agency? whose knowledge is seen as "Truth"? Who ruined the world? who is the oppressor? whose to blame... for capitalism, patriarchy, racism, sexism, heterosexism, transphobia, and all of the social ills of this world? who is the bane of our liberation and freedom? answer----- white, middle-class, heterosexual evangelical men. this is the answer, you can't get it wrong. the more you say it, the more profound it sounds.

each... and every.....time.

i use to really dig this. to a lot of people on the surface, this is feminism's mantra. this isn't my kind of feminism. blame the dude with a penis, and white skin. who digs females. makes reasonable money. and claims to know a God.

this way, it gave less onus on me. on women. on the marginalized, who i clung to like an over-protective mother, seeing no wrong in her children. but, i've discovered we all suck sometimes. we're all broken. we all oppress, as much as we are oppressed. white men have f.c.k.ed. up. im not disagreeing that this demographic has caused and continues to cause alot of poop. it is a problem that these privileged strands of identities, (straight, white, able-bodied) are for the most part assumed and unquestioned in our western society. it is a problem that this cultural production of westernized stampt hegemonic masculinity is as powerful as it is, at the sake of marginalizing others. these issues haunt me. but the answer shouldn't end with a pointed finger, "they did it". rather it should be a beginning point--- an opportunity for further dialogue. or deeper exploration. for critical thought.

if, the "white, middle-class, able-bodied, heterosexual, evangelical, man" is the irrevocable enemy, how will change ever really happen. by proclaiming academic war on the "oppressor", and by making all men who fit this category into enemies, we're jibbing ourselves. we're missing the point.

it's beginning to really tick me off that alot of women's studies students have this sentiment of dismissal, when-ever the white man is mentioned. Immediately their not taken seriously. their trouble. if an amazing article happens to be written by a rich straight Caucasian guy, their experiences, their knowledge is suddenly less worthy or deligitimate, because of their histories of power. if that same article is written by a first-nations, lesbian transwoman, suddenly it becomes more truthful. more valuable and legit. more sacred.

i feel its like reverse racism in a way. we're trying so hard to incorporate and celebrate and reclaim the voices of the oppressed, that in the process we're doing the same thing to our oppressor as He did to us. what is so revolutionary about an eye-for-an-eye? there won't be change, there wont be liberation until we're all in it together. men. women. and all of us who are floating beyond or in between. all of these voices matter. all of these voices can speak resistance. if we name someone the enemy, if we blame instead of discuss, if we discount what anyone says based on their gender, sexuality, race, class etc., even if that means they are male, then we're being exclusionary. my feminism isnt about exclusion.

we need to all take responsibility. we need to all recognize that there is, even from the cracks of the margins, pockets of power. agency. resistance. there is power in solidarity. there is power in difference. it's not okay with me when students disregard, or roll their fresh feminist eyes at white-straight-men. its not okay with me to silence even those who have silenced us.

perhaps if the answer is "white-middle-class-heterosexual-able-bodied- (and heaven forbid) evengelical men", than the question should be, "who do we need to carve space for in feminism and feminsit discourse? who do we need to actively love and forgive? who do we need to connect with, to unite with? whose liberation is bound in ours?".

perhaps we all need to learn to love.

a love that can transcend social categories.

a love that sees value in all. and rejects none.